Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Geek 1 and Geek 2 have a conversation:

Today I'm a little bit sad because we're nearing the end of The Artist's Way. But every time I try to write about this sadness, it goes away.

me1: Now that we're almost to the end of week 12, I'm afraid we'll all go our seperate ways and forget about each other. The thought of this makes me feel really, really sad and a little bit lonely.
me2: This is just the beginning. We've spent the last 12 weeks getting to know each other under semi-structured circumstances and now...whew! now is just the beginning. The more I learn about these new people in my life, the more I realized how infinately complex we all are.

me1: I don't know if I'll keep this blog or not. I created it so that I'd have a seperate space to explore my thoughts and feelings. But I have another blog that I've kept for several years. I can't keep up with both. I'm afraid that if I don't write here anymore that I'll lose many of the connections I've made during the course of aw.
me2: The strange thing that's happened through aw is an explosion of new connections. Some of those connections are not even through aw, but through someone else, through someone else, through someone else. There are a large handful of people that I feel especially connected to...and when it comes down to it, they're the ones that matter. Connection works both ways--I think if I feel it, they must too. Even if I go back to only writing on my other blog, I'll make new links for those that I don't want to lose touch with. Anyway, I think in many ways, we've become like a tapestry--beautifully woven together.

me1: One of the best things about this aw group is the incredible doses of SUPPORT. I've begun to realize how important that kind of environment is for me. When aw ends, will I still have that?
me2: The support doesn't end with the book. I am grateful, SO grateful, to have become a part of this community. And the cool part is that it only continues to grow.

me1: But, technically, I haven't really finished! Life got busy with school and I feel like I really skimped on the 11th chapter and do not doubt it will be the same for this week as well.
me2: I'm gonna backtrack. I fell behind. I admit it--but I'm doing this for myself. There were several weeks that passed by without me. I couldn't keep up. But this is important to me. Oddly, there have been times that it was even more important than schoolwork. This has, on several occassions, led to problems with time management. But--wow--I needed this. Have you ever heard the phrase: "I finally got my shit together and now my ass is falling apart"? Yeah, I got my shit together by going to grad school and working towards my life and career goals...but then my ass fell apart in the process. Turns out, I have a lot of cleaning up to do--and that's why the aw has been important enough to occassionally put other things on hold. It's been worth every minute of grief. Actually, it's resolved a lot of grief.

me1: I've become a complete and utter geek.
me2: I've always been a geek. What's new?

me3: Yes--definately a geek.

11 Comments:

Blogger GreenishLady said...

I don't doubt that all these connections will continue to be important to me... things may move about a bit, but I'm realising that things move, shift, change, and can hold steady at the same time, just as AW says it can. I'm looking forward to seeing what new things emerge as we all move on after these 12 weeks (accidentally hit 132 there!)

12:32 PM  
Blogger Endment said...

Change is part of forward motion --- The most important thing is that we can choose. If we choose we can maintain these strong supportive contacts. They may be build on a somewhat changed foundation ---

Looking forward to seeing what is ahead

3:36 PM  
Blogger tara dawn said...

Even though I haven't participated in AW, I can say with complete conviction that I feel a very strong connection with you. New opportunities will arise...we will all continue to find new ways to nourish this wonderful community of blogging friends...and we will all continue to grow. The irony is that because of this AW group, I have gone out and bought the book myself. Mark and I are planning on starting it after the move...I am sure I will be sharing much with you and seeking your beautiful wisdom.
Love and peaceful wishes!!

3:43 PM  
Blogger In Otter Space said...

I was just starting to make a similar post. I too feel sad that TAW is ending. Maybe b/c there is no Final to celebrate The End with. Makes it a bit more tough. In college the final/paper was always such a drag I was glad to get the class over and done with.

I love your line: "I think in many ways, we've become like a tapestry--beautifully woven together."

4:04 PM  
Anonymous tinker said...

I think I know how you feel - I'm feeling a bit like it's "graduation time." Just because the AW is ending, doesn't mean we can't still "pop in" to support & inspire one another. It's been an interesting path - I, too, am looking forward to see what lies ahead for us all :>)

8:11 PM  
Blogger megg said...

Well, I didn't participate this time (started too late!) but did you know that Julia has ANOTHER 12 week book?!?! She's written 'Walking in this World' so perhaps you could start her new book either in Jan. again or even sooner.

As for me, I will follow you wherever you go! I hope that you will continue to be the person in both blogs - maybe on just one or maybe in both, who knows. I have really enjoyed connection with you on here & now on your other one. It's just going to get better!!!

12:57 AM  
Blogger Kara said...

Yes, I feel a bit sad too - no it's scared that I'll lose connection with other bloggers - but then I realize all it takes is a few comments - so I think we'll stay connected. I'll come read this blog or follow you over to your other blog if you blend the two together.

9:19 AM  
Blogger gkgirl said...

teehee...
i love the dual conversation
:)
also because
it conveyed alot of what i was
feeling right now too...
especially the falling behing part
but choosing to go back and do
for yourself...

and the importance of the connections
:)

12:15 PM  
Blogger melba said...

You make me laugh!
I just added your other blog to my sidebar.
So don't worry we won't lose touch even if you stop this blog.:)

3:32 PM  
Blogger Julie said...

From one geek to another...

I know what you mean...all of you! I am really sad at the AW being nearly complete and losing the connections that have formed. Part of me wants to be on week 12 for just a little bit longer, like another week, just because I'm not ready for completion yet.

I promise I will keep reading all of your blogs :)

11:56 PM  
Blogger tess said...

This is a thoroughly wonderful post!

These line had me virtually snorting with laughter, because I so deeply relate to everything you wrote around it:

Have you ever heard the phrase: "I finally got my shit together and now my ass is falling apart"?

I got pretty depressed in the midst all my own chaos(my ass definitely fell apart, but that's a perpetual thing with me)especially because AW is just about over.

But I don't intend to stop connecting to you and other blog pals.

Hey, let's have a remedial AW group for skimpers, skippers and out-right cheaters (like me)! We can make up for lost chapters and stretch it out for weeks! :-)

10:32 PM  

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